Over these days, I have been trying to stop loving someone, no matter how many times I have told myself that I would be fine. Still I truly understand one thing in my deep heart, that is I love him so much. So much so much, that I just want him to be happy. I am not sure that my way of loving you is right or wrong, but what I believe is that my first interests of all my decisions were just want you to be happy. Sometimes the results just don't really come up as what you wish.
I am not sure what I have done will bring the best for you, but I just don't want us to be struggling in our relationship anymore. Maybe giving up or letting going are the only way to make you feel better. Be honest, I have never felt anything bad about you to leave me and get a better one. Since I will be happy with whatever you are happy with. Maybe this is what I believe for what love can do for the others.
The way I love you is just like I am loving my family. Sometimes I just get really angry by how your actions had upset me, however at the end of the day, the anger just will have gone. Soon or later I will not be angry at all. So when you said how me and my mum were not taking your affords into account, this really upset me. Since you will never know how much I have scarifies for you when you have came to China and Hong Kong.
I didn't want to enlarge for that, since I know you have also scarifies something too. But when you told me that you thought I was appreciating what you have done for me, that's really upset me. Is true that I was angry at you sometimes by your actions, but then I have already get over it and accepted it. In order, to make myself feel better, what I could do was just typing all my feelings out on the blog. I didn't think this could be hurting you somehow, therefore I have just blocked the blog.
I have never intent to hurt you in anyway at all. As the first day you told me how I haven't done something to make you feel better, indeed I care about what you have told so much. Since that day on, we have been fighting so much about everything. Fighting with wasn't really fun at all for me, as you may never know how powerful of your words can be to me.
I just wish I haven't met at all. However, I still want to thanks destiny for bring us together for somehow a short period of time. At least I could have this chance to know what Love really mean to me, and I believe this is what life should have a goal.
No matter how much tears I have dropped, and no matter how much pain of this love could have bought me though. I just hope one day the tears will try, and pain will die, and the love will just gone.
After all, I am happy that now you can move on your life happily. So this is just what I really wish to know. Happy to know that you have already got your better one. And now all what I can is just " Wish you all the best".
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